More Is Caught Than Taught: Modeling a Life Fully Alive for Our Daughters
More Is Caught Than Taught
I have four daughters. I love having four daughters (and, of course, my son—but this one’s for the girls).
When I think about their future, I find myself looking closely at my own life.
I’ve never been one to hand out parenting advice. So much of motherhood is nuanced—woven with personalities, seasons, and the quiet voice of God’s guidance in our homes. What works beautifully for one family might not fit another. But if there’s one truth I’ve come back to over and over again, it’s this:
More is caught than taught.
Our kids are watching—always. They may not repeat everything we say, but they absorb how we live. The “do as I say, not as I do” approach simply doesn’t hold. And yet, perfection isn’t the goal. We’re human; we fail and fumble daily. What matters most is how we handle those moments—whether we confess, reconcile, and model humility. That’s what teaches them how to process their own mistakes with grace.
Living Fully Alive
When I think about my daughters, I don’t just want them to make good choices—I want them to be fully alive. I want them to step into the calling God has placed on their lives with confidence and wonder. I want them to recognize their gifts and multiply them, trusting they have a good Father who delights in their courage.
For a long time, I thought pursuing personal dreams might be selfish. But now I see it differently. A woman living fully alive in her calling isn’t self-centered—she’s secure. She’s not grasping for attention or approval; she’s grounded in her identity and able to pour out of her overflow.
That “overflow” is something I think about often. It’s the natural outpouring that happens when we’re filled with the Holy Spirit—when love, joy, peace, and patience become the fruit of our inner life rather than the result of striving.
The Joy of Watching Them Bloom
Since moving to South Carolina, I’ve watched my oldest daughter come alive in ways that bring tears to my eyes. She auditioned for her school’s worship team—something completely new to her—and now leads worship for her entire school every Monday morning. She’s also discovered a dormant love for art that’s beginning to blossom.
Watching her use her gifts for God’s glory brings me deep joy. I imagine this is how God feels when He sees us step into the unknown, trusting Him with what He’s placed inside us. It’s worship—when we use our gifts with open hands and courageous hearts.
Am I Modeling That Kind of Faith?
That question lingers for me.
If more is caught than taught, then what are my daughters catching from me?
Am I showing them what it looks like to follow God even when it’s uncomfortable?
To use my own gifts boldly, without comparison or fear?
To live fully awake to the life He’s called me to?
Because this isn’t about doing something grand or glamorous. For one woman, it might look like running a business with excellence. For another, it might be baking bread for a neighbor, learning a new craft, or quietly mentoring someone younger in faith. The point isn’t the scale—it’s the obedience.
Whatever our season, the question remains the same:
Are we living in a way that reflects trust, creativity, and the courage to be led by God?
Because our daughters are watching—and I want mine to see what a woman looks like when she lives fully alive in Him.
💭 Reflection for You:
What does “living from the overflow” look like in your life right now? Where might God be nudging you to step forward in faith, even if it feels small?
